We’re Playing the COOKING GAME!

toddler cooking game leilazamoramoreno

Now that Cesar is a bit older his attention span is growing where he can focus and direct himself to do a specific task for a longer time before getting distracted and doing ‘what he wants’.
While we are cooking, doing dishes, cleaning – general points of every day maintenance which many would call a ‘chore’, I instead decided to direct the points as being GAMES.

A game will always have a particular end goal, plays out in a particular framework with particular rules which need to be followed for the game to work and to reach our end goal.
When I instantaneously came up with the idea and started applying it, showing to Cesar how it works – I realized I was in essence transferring my understanding and definition of a word.
What does ‘doing dishes’ mean? How do you practically carry out ‘doing dishes’? When he goes off course (say he starts putting sliced food in the organic waste bin instead of the cooking pot), I can show him that he is not playing the game anymore and how his action is now not in line with the game, how it impacts and compromises the end result we are aiming for within the game – and so is in essence deviating from the definition of the word (eg. cooking).
He has been very receptive to this approach and does not ‘react’ or ‘take it personal’ that he cannot just follow his impulses but needs to stick to the framework provided. When he keeps deviating it is usually that we have been doing the activity for quite some time and his attention span has been stretched out. Then we stop with our activity and do something he wants to do for a while and pick up on our game at a later time.

Instead of teaching him an emotional interpretation of the word as a ‘burden’ or ‘chore’ where you immediately feel yourself going into a ‘low’, showing him and teaching him the word for what it is and how you practically carry it out (and finding ways on how to improve!) has been much fun for both him and myself. He enjoys participating because whether we are doing dishes, cooking, cleaning, dancing, throwing balls for dogs, going for a walk – he doesn’t differentiate between ‘work’ and ‘play’ – as all these actions are the same in that they are all physical activities, but they differ in the type of physical activity that is required of him. He is the one dragging the broom out of the laundry room, he is the one running to the sink BEGGING to do dishes, he is the one populating our room with cloths to wipe everything clean. And when we are doing an activity and it’s the adults deviating from the game – then he will point it out and demand we do it properly. Sometimes he will be throwing a tantrum and be really upset and I will ‘not know why’ – until he points out what I missed, I correct myself and he settles down.

Other times we will be busy with a particular activity and he will be reactive, frustrated and uncooperative – and I myself will be reactive and frustrated to his behaviour. Then I start explaining to him the Game we are playing, and as I am explaining it, I realise that I hadn’t even properly defined and clarified the game for myself – which he was picking up on. Because I wasn’t clear on the game we were playing, the parameters and the rules – this left a void inside of myself which was impulsing a sense of directionlessness, which Cesar reacted to by: being directionless in his behaviour.

As I explain the game to him (and myself) and align the definition for myself, I reach a point of stability, grounding and direction, which instantaneously spills over to Cesar who immediately aligns himself.

Words, really DO create our Worlds!

 

Utter Dependence & Access to Life – Part 2

baby sleeping closeness leilazamoramoreno

Cesar – 1,5 months young

This is a continuation to Utter Dependence & Access to Life | Part 1

In my previous blogpost I mentioned how the first three months were the hardest, as my baby needed my constant availability to meet his needs.

Here, I faced an interesting point, because even though no-one can deny that it is physically intensive to tend to another being 24/7 for three months, it wasn’t the physical ‘toughness’ which hit me the most – but the mental wall I hit.

I was in a constant friction between meeting my baby’s needs and meeting my own ‘needs’.

Practically speaking, all my needs were actually taken care of. I had a comfortable room, I got access to plenty of food and water, I was able to rest for moments and tend to my hygiene.

The ‘needs’ which weren’t getting met where my mental needs. These were the collective of all the things I believed I ‘should be doing’ and ‘should be getting’. I thought it was wrong to spend every moment of every day tending to my baby. I needed to ‘do something’, I needed to ‘be productive’. In how I was raised, much emphasis was given to the value of achievement and producing tangible results. Not only at home or in school, but also in the general system/society we’ve set up. Unless you’re doing something productive, unless you are contributing (in the sense of how ‘productivity’ and ‘contribution’ are defined within material accumulation) – you are useless and you must be lazy/evil/selfish. We see this in the way the labour system is set up – unless you are working and you are employed and functioning as a ‘human resource’, you will not receive (sufficient) income to live a dignified life.

I was restless, I shouldn’t have to be taking care of this ‘needy’ being. I should be doing things, making things. I honestly believed that these ‘urges’ were a reflection of positive ambitions within myself, that I was ‘wanting to be a good person’ and ‘contribute to the whole’. But then why was I stressing out so much about it, why was this restlessness almost painful?

As I looked deeper into my ambitions, I noticed they were not in fact ‘positive reflections’ of who I am, but were actually stemming from deeply negative fears and feelings inside myself. I wasn’t truly interested in being ambitious and being productive, I was driving myself to be so in order to get away from the dark nagging feeling inside myself, that if I were not to pursue these ambitions, that if I were not to be ‘productive’ = that I will be rejected, that I will be ostracized, that I will be excluded from the community, from society and be left to fend for myself. I was afraid that ‘Who I Am’ as a being is not enough, and that it is all about ‘what I do’.

I tried to push for being productive, for engaging in ‘work’ – to show my value, to show that ‘I am needed’ and not completely useless. But for me to pursue this, I had to compromise my baby’s needs. I had to ignore him to ‘get to my own things’. And he grew increasingly unhappier and unhappier. Inside myself, I was feeling more comfortable, because I was engaging myself, the fear of being useless wasn’t so prominent – but now I am in a situation with a deeply unhappy baby; and so inner conflict and turmoil still remained, they just shifted sides. I managed to appease my inner reality, but now my external reality was in distress.

So, tired of all the conflict, friction and turmoil – I took a moment to stop, to pause and re-evaluate everything which I was doing and how what I was participating within was affecting my child.

My inherent fear that who I am as Life is not good enough, was a belief so entrenched within myself that I felt the need to constantly prove my worth. In doing so, I was consequently no longer meeting my child’s needs in order to appease my own fears and self-worth insecurities. But within doing so, I was creating an environment for my child where HIS worth, HIS value was being undermined. He was in agony, his needs are not being met – are his needs not worth of being met? Is his Life not valuable enough to be completely secured?

Unintentionally, by wanting to avoid my own sense of worthlessness, this was exactly what I was creating for my child.

Problem.

I was (and still am) in a unique situation. I live with a group of people who can support me and the livelihood of my child and myself where my financial stability remained the same whether I was being ‘productive’ or not. I had a choice. I did not have to insist on working, I had in fact the choice to dedicate myself to taking care of my baby completely and absolutely, without this compromising my livelihood.

So I made a decision. I will be there for my baby, absolutely.

Obviously this is easier said than done. As I was living the decision to dedicate myself to my baby absolutely, many fears, insecurities, frictions and doubts would still rise up. These were deeply ingrained within my unconscious mind from my own upbringing. The only way I could stand by and live my decision, was to investigate all the thoughts, emotions and feelings which would come up, to forgive myself for them and let them go. The only way I could state and secure my child’s worth in this world, was by stating and securing mine (which honestly, would have been a lot more difficult, if not impossible had it not been for the supportive environment I live in).

I had to redefine worth and value for myself, to see, recognize, realise and live the worth and value of taking care of another being, another life – who as a baby was completely helpless, dependent and physically incapable of any ‘productive input’. Yet when you look into a baby’s eyes – you know, you see that they have the right to life, you know they have the right to be here and live a fulfilling life. Yet despite this knowledge, we’ve somehow still managed to create a world system and environment which constantly pushes people to the brink of survival, constantly pushing people to compromise on living for the sake of acquiring just the necessary resources to ‘make it another day’. A system that insists you are not good enough and need to constantly prove your worth, where you need to compete because if you’re not up for the job – well, you can simply be replaced.

For several months – I was no-one, I was nothing, I was just darkness. Who I was as the person I used to be and live, the personality I had accustomed to identify myself with as ‘who I am’ as all my hopes, dreams, fears and desires – was non-existent. There was a complete silence within myself. All I did was serve. I served my baby and his life in every moment of every day, and in doing so I served my own.

Is this the perfect way to come into being into this world? I would say no.

Looking at my son, he hated being completely helpless and dependent. He hated that his every need was dependent on a responsiveness of my own.

Is it necessary? At the moment I would say yes.

The manifestation of a baby as a completely helpless and dependent being – forces us to push to the absolute extreme realisation that we are in fact interdependent. That ‘no-one’ is an island. That every individual person’s actions affects the whole.

That for a child to come into this world and realise its utmost potential, we have to stand as the living example. If we want the child to grow up accepting and realising its self-worth, we must stand as an environment which resonates this. If a child comes into the world in an environment of compromise, of conditionality – then that is what the child will integrate and become. We can’t have one without the other. We can’t bring children into this world, seeing them as a fresh new start and believing it is ‘all up to them’ to make a brighter future. It is for us to set the foundation in place.

Does that mean that I will keep tending to my child’s every need into eternity and protect him from the outside dysfunctional world into eternity? No

The transition of the child to move from helplessness and complete dependence to one of being capable and independent (in so far that we can, really be ‘independent’) is a process. As he moves and grows, my services, my ‘interventions’ become less and less. My availability remains constant, but the frequency that this availability is being called upon diminishes and diminished overtime.

He learns that he is not dependent on myself as the mother with the breasts and the breastmilk to fill his tummy. There are other resources available. He learns that I am there when I need him which translates into self-confidence and self-reliance. He learns that he can give himself direction, but that I will be there when he finds himself in an unknown situation. From this unknown situation and my presence, his learns and integrates new perspectives which he next time can apply on his own.

Securing and dignifying his being, his presence and life – he learns that others deserve the same treatment. He learns to look at situations within the consideration of not only what is best for him but what is best for everyone.

There’s often a fear that gets expressed when seeing someone take care of a baby’s every need that he will become dependent, immature – emotionally attached forevermore. That we need to show the child that the world is ‘a hard place’, ‘that nothing comes easy’ and that ‘they better get used to it’.

This is a false dilemma – as if there is no other way than preparing your child for the harsh reality we live him by deliberately instilling a sense of insecurity inside themselves. We can in fact, provide a sound foundation in the child’s life – where his self-worth and self-appreciation is so absolute that no matter the challenges he or she will face in life, he or she will not doubt one’s ability to respond to these challenges – and to look, see and analyse any and all situations from a practical common sense perspective; rather than coming from a fear of losing its self-worth and seeing that self-worth being entirely dependent on how their external environment treats them.

Dependency, immaturity and emotional attachment come about when one’s self-worth is NOT secured, when one’s self-value is NOT dignified – and forevermore seek out confirmation from our environment that we are allowed to be here, that we are allowed to express ourselves. Every action, experience and move we make – is fear driven, driven by the belief that we are not worthy and dependent on others to give it to us.

(Funny enough, before I was cooking up this post I was reading a book about horses and the human-horse relationship, where their ‘fight or flight’ stress response was compared to that of a child where many similarities were found. Here a little snippet on the research done around this subject:
“Biological psychology researcher Megan Gunnar and her colleagues did infant studies that confirmed animal research findings. In their work, infants three months of age who received consistent responsive care produced less cortisol. Also, eighteen-month-olds classified as insecurely attached (who had received lower levels of responsiveness) revealed elevated levels of stress hormone.7 These same children at age two continued to show elevated levels of cortisol and appeared more fearful and inhibited. Again, these children were those who had been classified as having lower levels of maternal responsiveness.8 Other investigations have confirmed these findings.9 Dr. Gunnar reports that the level of stress experienced in infancy permanently shapes the stress responses in the brain, which then affect memory, attention, and emotion.10”
http://www.naturalchild.org/guest/linda_folden_palmer2.html

The horse book (Tao of Equus) also made reference to the work of Dianna Hine)

 

 

 

Utter Dependence & Access to Life | Part 1

father son newborn leilazamoramoreno

Here’s a picture of Cesar, just three days old on his first day home, at the farm.

He needed a little bit of sunshine to help filter out some excess bilirubin.

From being in the womb where his needs are constantly cared for as being a part of my body, he was now an individual being. One of the first things that struck me was the frequency of these needs, which were basically present pretty much *all the time* for about three months. In a way, looking at where he came from – it does make sense. In the womb, he had constant supply of nourishment, constant supply of physical contact (and the ease of peeing in the womb whenever it pleases him!).

The first three months of his life consisted of constant feeding, sleeping and nappy changes.

At first, I was doing everything ‘by the book’. Having him sleep in a crib, trying to keep his feeds apart, only nursing for x amount of time.

It was absolutely horrible.

He would nurse forever, literally hours on end, Once he dropped from my breast – I had to change his nappy because he’d usually excrete right after each feed. By the time the nappy was changed, he wanted to nurse again. Maybe now he didn’t poo or pee and I had an opening to put him in the crib. The moment his body touches the crib and my hands let go = he cries. The moment he is in my arms, he is satisfied, and looks to nurse some more.

During the day I was living in my rocking chair, during the night, not laying in my bed for more than 20 minutes at a time between long nursing periods.

I was exhausted, my body – my body burn out.

The paediatrician suggested I limit his feeds to 20 minutes only, make sure there is an hour in between.

I timed his feeds, I would struggle getting him to unlatch, I put him in his crib.

He cries, he cries and he cries.

My chest hurts.

It reminds me of when I was in the hospital, where they brought Cesar to me for a short moment to check if he had his sucking reflex before they quickly rushed him back to the nursery to keep an eye on his blood sugar levels.

When they gave him to me, and I embraced him and brought him to my breast. There was such an intense moment of calmness, wholeness, completeness, tranquillity inside the both of us. Alas, it only lasted for a split second – as the moment he latched on, they ripped him off to take him away. As they picked him up and took him away – right after that moment that our bodies stopped touching – he open his eyes and LOOKED straight at me, into me. His body, his eyes – everything was saying NO! – WHY?

I listened as I hear his screams fade as they take him away.

My chest hurts like all hell.

 

Anyway – back to the main story.

Suffice to say that the scheduled feeding did not last for very long.

Each time we’d follow the schedule – we’d wait 15 minutes: he’s still screaming his heart out.

30 minutes: he is still screaming his heart out.

45 minutes: he is still screaming his heart out.

1 hour: he is still screaming his heart out.

Now he gets his next feed.

We thought, well maybe it’s just these few times, we have to keep trying.

He would do it over, and over and over again.

Sure – he wasn’t feeding all the time, but I wasn’t getting any rest exactly either. My chest, my body would hurt so much hearing him want physical contact, closeness, nourishment.

I said fuck it – this scheduling is not working for me.

The tiredness, the physical exhaustion and pain – they were going to be there, there’s no point for him to suffer needlessly.

(The first three weeks, nursing was also incredibly painful, like no pain I ever experienced before. My nipples were completely destroyed, bleeding, crusty – then regenerated themselves being more pliable and soft at which point the nursing became painless – this pain factor also played a big role in trying to make the ‘scheduled feeding’ work).

So now I was back to nursing him pretty much 24/7.

Sleep was still an issue. He slept terrible in his cot. He only ever slept peacefully in my arms. I started reading up on co sleeping in the books I had. The issue was very controversial – constantly pressing on the danger of killing your child in your sleep. I looked only – again, most articles geared towards scaring death into you.

I found some material of mothers cosleeping. They did not experience any of the issues all those articles by professionals put forward. But how can I trust them? The scary, professional input seems so much more credible. But it wasn’t working, we weren’t getting any sleep.

So little by little, I would start nursing him in the bed at night and leave him to sleep with me. I made a firm decision within myself – to not move or do ANYTHING while sleeping. If I move, I must be awake. If he moves, I wake. If Gian moves, I wake.

Slowly but surely, the frequencies increased, slowly but surely, he was now always nursing and sleeping with us.

My God

What a relief.

How different things would have been if we had done this from the beginning.

In the womb, his needs were being met instantly, continuously without cessation. How could I expect him to behave any differently once outside of it? This was all he’d ever known.

Even now – when he is 2 years old – there is no ‘thought process’ involved in between his need and the expression of this need.

There is a need I experience inside my body – I express this need.

As a baby, he was utterly, frail and dependent. His only connection to life, the only thing keeping him alive, was the breast and warmth. This was his lifeline. When he has a need to nurse, he feels it, he experiences it in his body and he expresses it – who am I to say: No, you can’t have access to your life-line right now. That’s what happened that moment in the hospital. He had a need, he needed his connection to life – represented by the breast and the milk that flows from it. Milk freely produced by the body, milk which is always available, a breast which never runs empty.
And instead, he was taken away. And that’s when he looked at me with BIG EYES – eyes asking a question: WHY?

When we come into this world, our parents are our guides. Our parents are our examples from who we learn about the world around his and from whom we learn how to navigate in this world.
You trust they know best, they brought you into this world, you are a part of them.

So when we as a parent – advertently or inadvertently say NO to a child, say that ‘they cannot have access to Life’ – what does a child do with that information? Well the parents know best, there must be a reason why I am not deserving of life, there must be something wrong with me… And that is how we are all Born in Sin.

While nursing young Cesar, I was still busy studying economics. The resemblances and similarities in how we have set up and structured the world and how we set ourselves up and structured our approach to our children = it was flabbergasting.

We have a system where Money is one’s lifeline, one’s access to life. Yet – we do not give it unconditionally. The Earth, the Universe – everything is perfectly in place to provide abundance to all. Yet we withhold, yet we place conditions. Now we live in a world where everyone believes they are inherently dysfunctional. That it is normal to have to ‘fight for life’ – just as a baby kept screaming and crying for food and physical contact eventually gives up and gives in within the acceptance that struggle is an inherent part of life. Our inherent sin and dysfunction driving our every decision, our every move we make in life in a futile attempt to ‘redeem’ ourselves.

We believe it is normal to fight through another day, to demean ourselves and degrade ourselves just to get a job and have little bit of money to get by.

It is the Way of Heaven to diminish superabundance, and to
supplement deficiency. It is not so with the way of man. He takes
away from those who have not enough to add to his own superabundance.

Who can take his own superabundance and therewith serve all under
heaven? Only he who is in possession of the Tao! “ Lao Tzu – Tao Te Ching

To change the world, we have to start with ourselves. To recognize the Life Force within us, to recognize that Life is all around us and that we all Equally deserve access to Life.
It starts with a baby, soft, frail, weak – utterly dependent on its parents for its Life connection, and making sure that this connection is met and fulfilled. To be available to your child, always – as a statement that Life is available to you, through me. You are welcome and deserving, you are whole and complete.

The End and the Beginning

mother son birth leilazamoramoreno

Flashback…
Oh how I did not know what I was getting myself into! The last few months of pregnancy had been such a rough ride, I didn’t really care what was about to unfold – I was just happy that the pain and strain of carrying a baby inside was over. The few days at the hospital were nice for my body to recover but I couldn’t wait to get out and get the parenting journey started for real. Because Cesar’s blood sugar levels were low I couldn’t see him much as they wanted to keep close tabs on him. This was quite rough for me because I wanted nothing more than keeping him close to me and embrace his presence. Though in the moments that I had him with me I had so many insecurity and doubts about myself and how I would be as a mother that the slightest cry of him set off a tornado of conflicting emotions. I wanted him close – but I didn’t know how to soothe him, let alone direct all the experiences rushing around inside myself – being glad and sad when someone would come to take him off my hands.
Holding this new, frail life inside your hands, being completely dependent on you – it brings up so many experiences, worries, insecurities and doubts. It brings who you are and what you have been living into a whole new perspective, and the only way to go forward is to change all those parts of you so you can be in the best possible position to support another life. There’s really nothing quite like it. The responsibility is immense, the gifts that flow from it are great.

#flashback #birth #hospital #baby #firsttimemom #selfreflection #introspection #mother #newlife #dependency #responsibility #giftofparenting

Expanding your World through your Child

toddler bug grasshopper awareness

Here, Cesar is tracking a youngster grasshopper, who is looking very yellow. Cesar’s been all about bugs these past weeks. He makes a point of it to fond every single bug in the room and when he finds a surprising one he will grab the closest person to come join in this moment of absolutely amazement with him. He is also learning a lot of bug names and about death – as many bugs that end up in human living environments tend to perish relatively quickly. When he finds a dead bug or one who is impaired and will die, he will give it to our resident golden orb spider, his gaze absolutely fixed and glued to the action of the spider prepping and eating the bug. If he finds them dead or impaired in Maite and Lj’s room, he will give them to the little chick and duckling to eat. In the fields he will follow and track bugs and observe whole ant nests as they go about their day. Simply because bugs have become a fascination for Cesar, I’ve become more aware of the bug and critter presence throughout my days. I love picking up on his fascination and making them my own. There’s nothing like finding an interesting bug he hasn’t seen before and showing it to him – a bug that I previously would have totally missed – and for him it’s a moment to see that whatever he is into: I will support, nothing is ‘too small’ or insignificant – and what he is into does not go by unnoticed.

#parenting #toddler #relationship #mother #insects #bugs #nature #fascination #obsession #whatsthatbug

Parenting is AWFUL!

parenting is awful horrible leilazamoramoreno

On Social Media we constantly get bombarded with articles, quotes and images of ‘what it means to parent’, where the baseline mostly comes down to “children ruined my life but it’s the best thing ever that happened to me”. That last bit being a single sentence in a page long rant on how awful it is to be a parent. The other day I came across one such article something like “15 quotes which sum up parenting”. Each quote would point out something awful but then give it a quirky twist that makes it all ‘alright again’. Many of these “awful points” revolve around how we treat our children and the lifestyle we impose on them. Think ‘going to sleep at x time’, ‘having to eat what we feed you’, ‘not taking children serious when they throw a tantrum’, etc. When we follow and enforce a particular parenting lifestyle that over and over and over again brings us to a point of conflict – not only for ourselves, but our children too – shouldn’t we stop for a moment and question what we are doing? Shouldn’t we for a moment stop and check of there’s an alternative? If parenting is a life ruining mission, then something’s wrong. Whenever I find myself in a position of wanting to “fight” my toddler, I know I am looking at the situation from a skewed perspective – and need to consider all the angles available to me. Doesn’t mean that parenting isn’t tough – it takes a lot to dedicate yourself to the life of another person who is much less capable than you. But when it sucks all way around and the only consolation is that it sucks for others as well — we really need to have a look at what we are doing.

#parenting #parenthood #mother #motherhood #media #struggle #burden #awful #children #family #continuumconcept #startaskingquestions #paradigmshift

Poo Blankets for Trees

toddler gardening orchard fertilize mulch compost leilazamoramoreno

Today Cesar and I went and gave some of the trees a ‘poo blanket’. We each
had a bucket and he insisted on wearing one of my (way too big for him)
gloves. We’d fill up our buckets by the carport, by hand or with some of his
beach toys – carry them to the orchard and spread the poo around the base of
the fruit trees. When it rains, the fertilizing properties of the horse poo
compost will trickle down into the earth to provide the fruit trees with the
nutritional elements they need this summer while they grow. Over the
compost, we will also place a layer of mulch from old stable bedding hay,
which again provides extra nutrition when it rains and will assist with
keeping the earth moist by the tree, as not as much water will be able to
evaporate on the hot days. The mulching also helps with keeping weeds at
bay. Cesar enjoyed every step of the process, but unfortunately it was a
very hot day and we only got two trees done before he insisted we stop and
seek out the shade. We’ll be doing this little activity every day, as I’m
always looking for new ways for Cesar to learn, explore and discover, to
contribute to farm activities and use up his abundant toddler energy.

#trees #fruittrees @DesteniFarm #figtree #mulching #summer #rainseason
#compost #horsepoo #fertilization #toddler #toddleractivities #farmlife
#motherhood #parenting #parenthood #mother #orchard #nature #motherearth

Bugs, bugs, bugs!

toddler bug leilazamoramoreno

With heat and rain come bugs, and so comes Cesar’s newest obsession. At first he would only look at them and if he would touch them it was almost always to squish them. It’s not that he per se wanted to squish them but didn’t really know how to go about picking up such tiny creatures. Last few days we’ve had lots of practice gently moving our fingers to bugs so they can mount on and crawl on us. This didn’t always go ‘fast enough’ for Cesar where he would end up rushing and shoving them instead of just gently moving his finger. Then we started practicing letting the bugs crawl on a medium instead of our hands/fingers likes sticks, blade of grass or piece of hay/straw. This worked out much better for Cesar as he could get his desired result quicker. Picking them up has been a challenge. Two nights we caught some flying ants who were swarming into the light, so the little chick and duckling could have some extra protein for themselves. He was very reluctant picking them up and catching them with their wings flapping quickly, and their legs moving quickly – the slightest touch being very ticklish and not really knowing what to do with the experience or the bug. In the meantime he has gotten better at picking them. This bug he gently picked up between index and thumb to not touch his legs. Eventually one of the legs scratched him which he didn’t like so he put him on a sock to observe him better upclose. He now loves running around and finding bugs in great astonishment, grabbing the closest person and dragging them to his discovery. Within this I’ve been facing my own share of bug fears so @gianrobberts needs to step in from time to time to give both Cesar AND myself direction on how to work with a particular bug. I enjoy seeing @gianrobberts expression at work with animals and bugs, they are as comfortable strolling around on him as they would on a tree. Still have a lot to learn from him on how to physically ground myself and stand equal to nature instead of fearing it.

#bugs #critters #insects #nature #beetle #toddler #explore #learn #discover #naturallearningability #parenting #mother #beingachildagain #fear

Listen to Your Body

homeopathy nux vomica baby toddler teething growing pains body leilazamoramoreno

Cesar keeps surprising me with how in-tuned he is with his body. He knows what he wants and when he wants it. When he is going through an upcoming teething patch, he starts looking for our homeopathic teething support remedy and bottle. Pointing at all the usual places where it is stored and ‘pretending’ to put them in his mouth so we can get an idea of what he is looking for. The teething comes with lots of unsettledness and the adrenaline which is coupled to the pain leaves him being tired but unable to sleep. So when I made myself a cup of catnip chamomile tea – which was standing among many cups on my desk (yes, guilty of cup hoarding) – he insisted he wanted THAT cup with WHATEVER’S IN THERE (catnip works as a sedative and chamomile is calming and relaxing). I shared my tea with him and he grounded himself in no time.
When we’re not sure if he is going through teething or growing pains – we show him our different bottles of homeopathic support and tissue salts – and he will pick up or point at the one he is needing. If he is hungry he will run to the fridge and tell us what he wants to eat (or maybe just play with).
We never forced any foods on him but always presented him with choices, and sharing the food we eat ourselves. If he wants to eat it, he eats it. If he wants to chew on it and spit it out, then he can do that. If he just wants to look at it and touch it – that’s fine too. We knew that inherently, the body knows what it needs and when it needs it, and did not want to impose any of our own preferences of foods on him. He’s a healthy boy who can make his own food choices, and knows when he needs additional support from nature.

#toddler #baby #body #intune #listentoyourbody #thebodyknows #trust #diets #regimes #health #lifestyle #parenting #mother #motherhood #children #upbringing #food

Get Creative

toddler father tent creativity leilazamoramoreno

With Cesar having lots of energy and eager to learn and explore – we must constantly push ourselves to be creative and create new things for Cesar to give him something to focus on and investigate. Our first tent was us simply sitting on our bed with my head creating a little tent space, but this quickly became too small. We have some plans to build Cesar an actual tent in the room, but we still need to get some more materials. Now we created an interim tent, with his old cot, which we made into a little couch as the base and an old sheet and some sticks to keep it up. So far Cesar is enjoying his little space!

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